Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Shades of Grace

As Valentine’s Day quickly approaches, everyone is eagerly waiting for what they hope will be a magical and romantic weekend, at least for those who have a 'significant other' in their lives. Red roses, chocolates, jewelry are amongst the typical Valentine’s Day gifts followed by dinner and a movie. This year many couples will go on to watch the movie, 50 Shades of Grey as part of their “special” day and will think that this is the perfect and most romantic movie that will be sure to boost their love lives ten notches up. It probably will for the night, but what happens next? After all of the erotic emotions fizzles away, you will be left back at square one, feeling lost and empty. Why? Because true love does not derive from a film, a book, or the media. True love comes from God, who He Himself is the definition of Love. God is love.

We live in a society where we have forgotten the fundamentals of true love, God. We have turned to lust, often confusing it with love and then we wonder why we live in such a sick and twisted world. We tend to forget that lust is temporary but love is everlasting. We were created to love and to be loved. So many people are searching for “true love” because there is a sense of longing that has been embedded in us, a void that can only be filled by God. In order to fill that void, we must first enter into an honest relationship with God Himself and allow His love to overflow in us and through us.
 
Today, I want to encourage you whether you’re single or in a relationship. Show yourself grace and show others grace as well.
Singles:
I hold you guys near and dear to my heart. I really do! I know how you may be feeling, "Valentine’s Day sucks! It’s a stupid day.. just hurry up and happen and let’s keep it moving to the next day and act as if nothing ever happened". Trust me, I know the feeling and for me, when I was single;  every Valentine’s Day was more like Halloween. Lol! My single ladies and I would joke about it all the time. But just because I’m  married now, and on the other side of the fence; so to speak, does not mean that “I don’t understand” because I do. I’m just not in that season any longer but there is something that I would love to say to you today:

Show yourself GRACE! When loneliness and depression tries to creep up, think GRACE. When sadness and negative thoughts come crawling your way, take a deep breath and exhale GRACE. When your past tries to step into your life, smile and whisper GRACE because that grace will lead you to a joyful future. Repeat with me: GRACE! This weekend, remember that:
  • You are beautiful and wanted
  • You are valuable and worthy
  • You will love and be loved
Please remember that!!!!

In a Relationship: (Married or Dating)
Your relationship does not have to depict that of a movie, much less ‘50 Shades of Grey’. If your relationship is built upon God’s love and His Word then you’re in good shape. Roman 12:2 says “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will”. Your definition of love is not how the world defines it; it’s defined by God’s word. The New Living Translation says it like this: “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think…” Many times we want to imitate what we see on TV and be like that specific “power couple” that the outlets are showing us, not knowing that a lot of them have far more issues than what the average couple does. Do not copy that type of behavior, the example has been set in the Word of God. You may not have a picture perfect relationship as others may portray on social media.. “Oh, look at my happy life...”, trust me they’re just showing you what they want, the “good” stuff because the bad and the ugly is kept away from others to see. So, please do not be deceived or feel the pressure to look like someone, because most likely, they're probably attempting to look like someone else and so forth. Stop trying to keep up with the Jones' and stay in your lane. Be yourself, the best possible YOU that you can be.
 
I am part of a Young Married Women/Young Single Mom’s Ministry called "LSA Lidia's: I am Brave 31" group (www.facebook.com/iambrave31) (www.twitter.com/iambrave_31) (www.instagram.com/iambrave31) (by the way, if you're looking to connect with a great group of women, check out the links above) Anyways, back to my story, last night we had our monthly group meeting and the topic of discussion was Perfectly Imperfect. The speaker was sharing her insight on what it is to be a Proverbs 31 woman and how often times, we are intimidated of becoming that woman because we feel like we cannot measure up to her high and perfect standards. Show yourself GRACE. You're doing an amazing job!

Women:
  • You are a great woman, wife, mother
  • You are valued, even if you still have a long list of chores to do
  • You are strong, appreciated and loved

Show your MEN some Grace!
  • Even when they didn’t take out the trash; don’t trash him for it
  • Show him respect and let him know that he is the man of the house
  • Listen and take his words into account
 
Show your RELATIONSHIP Grace!
  • Don’t compare your relationship or your spouse to others
  • Your relationship and your partner is unique, don’t try to be like others, it will never work
  • Show your relationship Grace because the grass is never green on the other side


1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is the definition of true love. Do you want a healthy, balanced, long-lasting happy relationship? Read, live and honor this: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

I'll end with this, true love is celebrated all year round, not only on February 14th of every year. Valentines Day is everyday because God who is love abides in us and our outwardly expression of love should be pure. His Grace is more than enough to help us each and every day (2 Corinthians 12:9). When you find yourself looking at others for validation, cut yourself some slack and give yourself a shade of grace. Give your spouse a shade of grace. Give your relationship a shade of grace. Everyone needs a shade of grace.
Be Encouraged, Be Blessed!
Landy Perez-Feliciano ♥

 
 

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